All You Need Is Love

image.jpgI try to only write positive posts regarding Zak but sometimes feel that I am not always being truly honest and sharing our more difficult times.

After putting Zak to bed last night my hubby had to pick me up off the kitchen floor……sobbing!! I am so grateful to him, he never asks any questions to what this time has sent me over the edge, he’s just there.

Zak’s best friend (only friend) is away from school this week and Zak finds this particularly challenging. At bath time tonight he told me that at playtime he is OK being on his own as he can “blend in” on the adventure playground or just kicking a ball. However eating lunch in the hall he struggles eating alone. He then proceeded to tell me he asked a few boys if they would like to sit with him, one of which replied……why would I want to sit with a boy like you???

With a heavy heart I explain to him that kids can be unkind and these kids are only 9 and can’t possibly understand how his magic little brain works and they just have different interests, that I’m always in his heart and to be proud of who he is.

I have to admit there is the unkind part of me that wants to march into the playground, hunt down the kid, pin him down and give him what for but what is that really teaching our kids.

If everyone’s first response was one of kindness all the other responses would pail to insignificance. When you are kind, the main beneficiary is you! When you are unkind the main beneficiary is you.

After 10 minutes of crying in Dave’s arms, I dust myself down as I am no use to Zak by allowing other people’s actions to hurt me so deep.
I go back upstairs and explain to Zak that all that matters in this life is being loved. You can have a hundred friends and be lonely. You can have success and be lonely. You can have money and be lonely.

You can never have love and be lonely.

Zak, you have a strong, loving family who adore you, you are such a lucky boy!!

There are 10 of us in your family who cheer you on all the way and that my gorgeous boy is like having a silent army behind you!

ADHD Doesn’t Exist????

After a week of family birthdays and Zak waiting impatiently for his to arrive……..the day is finally here!!! Zak is seven today and by 9am I am more exhausted than I was giving birth to him!!

However hard I try to keep the house calm and his presents to a minimum so that he can keep focus, the excitement of the day ahead gets the better of him. He is excited (and so he should be on his birthday) but his immaturity and lack of understanding vents this all in the wrong way and we end up with Zak upsetting the whole household and behaving in a totally unacceptable manner!!

I read a tweet this week from the “rent a gob” Katie Hopkins that said ADHD does not exist…..only bad mums! Although I admire her guts for saying a lot of things people are thinking, I am extremely uncomfortable for someone having such a strong opinion on something they obviously have no experience of.

I work damn hard in raising my boy and managing his behaviour and commit to it as a full time job! I will listen to anybody’s opinion on what I am doing right or wrong for Zak…….after they have walked in my shoes for six months, until then……..SHUT UP!!!

So Ms Hopkins I will say this…..words have wings, be careful of what you say……they may fly away and damage a mum who is struggling to cope!!!

As for Zak’s birthday, I have until school pick up to “re-ground” myself, breath deeply and find the energy to cope with tonight.

Happy Birthday to my gorgeous boy x x x x